I’m not sure I want to know what happened inside my dad’s house. Larry Pool shared a lot with me and I know they both went through hell. But the way the story goes in my head, my dad was bound and as Charlene was being led away, I know his mind was reeling. After the shock of being caught off guard passed, I can feel his brain racing to figure out how to get free. Both my dad and Charlene were fighters. He would have considered what was on his night table or in the drawer. He would have strained against the bindings to do something, anything, to help her. Like I said, I don’t want to know if that didn’t happen. I need to believe this is what happened.
Yesterday I wrote about the strength of the female survivors. But the truth is, there are male victims as well.
I can’t imagine the cognitive dissonance those men felt as they balance their own survival instinct with the need to protect their loved ones. They were trapped, struggling with the pain of being bound. They could hear their wives or daughters being hurt. One man died trying to protect his daughter. I don’t know if he’s been officially included by law enforcement, but for those of us who are involved, we include Claude Snelling as another victim.
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As I struggle to understand the complex feelings a woman can feel after being attacked, I can only imagine how it must feel to be the dad, the husband, the boyfriend. The rage and powerlessness my dad felt must have been mind-blowing. I’m not sure our brains were meant to handle this kind of conflict.
We haven’t heard from the men in this story. I’d very much like to. I will keep your story confidential if you choose, but I’d like to share the experience and how your path to healing has worked – or not worked. It’s as simple as sending me an email at jennifer at jcarole.com.
I’m hoping we can all learn from this. Understanding how the men have dealt with this in the last 40 years is just another step in our healing.
The Open Letter to the Male Survivors is such a sensitive and considerate invitation to those Men who had to endure crimes of the women they love and have loved. I can understand that some Men may want to keep their comments confidential, and I can respect this of them. But perhaps some Men would like to share with all of us how they are surviving as of today. We need to include them and afford them the opportunity also to speak their mind and express their feelings.
Jennifer, I was wondering if the little girl in the picture is you and your Daddy? So adorable.
The little girl is me. That Volkswagen was almost a person in our family. They bought it in 1964 brand new and that green color. It was my mom’s car and she took us everywhere in that thing. If you can imagine early 1970s and going to McDonalds’ was the biggest treat ever. That and an ice cream from Thrifty (two scoops for $.25). I haven’t heard from any of the men yet, but I’m hoping they will drop me a line. It would help me understand how they are feeling and thinking.
I appreciate your posts immensely, Ms. Carole. People who love true crime sometimes get lost in the murders of real people. People who had families, friends, and lives of their own. Thank you for reminding us that we are all still people.
Thank you. I think that’s been a huge takeaway from this for me – humanity is what matters most. We can’t see to get that from our leaders right now, but no matter what, regular Americans, most of us, are really good people who care about one another.